Breath of Heaven

Dear Friends & Family,

I am waiting in a silent prayer.
I am frightened by the load I bear.
In a world as cold as stone,
Must I walk this path alone?
Be with me now.
Be with me now.

Breath of heaven,
Hold me together,
Be forever near me,
Breath of heaven.
Breath of heaven,
Lighten my darkness,
Pour over me your holiness,
For you are holy.
Breath of heaven.

Do you wonder as you watch my face,
If a wiser one should have had my place,
But I offer all I am
For the mercy of your plan.
Help me be strong.
Help me be.
Help me.

Cindy & Curt
Breath of Heaven (Mary's Song) by Amy Grant, revised

Happy 6th month anniversary Cayden & Paige!

Clarissa & Cayden cooked an awesome dinner and had fun hanging out this weekend
 while Corbin, Curt & I were in Acton at the Popp's.
Cayden, Alan, Clarissa, Danielle & Shane (Corey in the reflection). 

Curt & I enjoyed a nice relaxing weekend at Paul & Lisa Popp's awesome home, with endless views of the mountains, fresh air and friends!

Bill, Larry, Bernie, Paul and Curt relaxing by the pool!

Longer Days & Stronger Rays

Dear Friends & Family,

When the kids were young I attended a parenting seminar. I remember the instructor asking us “What does your child see and hear when you wake them up in the morning or when you pick them up from school?” Do you wake them up with a frazzled “Let’s go, we’re late”, do you pick them up from school while talking on the phone or with a “Hurry up, we have to get you to practice?” 

I didn’t need that seminar, all I needed was to follow Curt’s example. When he wakes the children (when he was healthy), he would crawl in bed with them and slowly let them come to life. When he picks them up from school or practices he would never be in a rush to the next place, he always paused to see how their day was. He had time to throw the football around or volley the volleyball. He always made conversation with the coaches or other parents. When the kids were young he would bathe them and talk and play while they were in the tub. At bedtime as I read to the kids Curt would almost always join us. The kids knew (and still know) their Daddy loved them by not only his words but also his actions. He is the perfect example of a man “living in the moment.”

Up until he was no longer able, he would walk or wheel out to say goodbye when I left for work and would greet me at the car when I got home. His eyes were always lit up! I knew without a doubt that I was the love of his life! 

Tomorrow is the first day of summer. Normally our family looks forward to the long days and warm nights; carefree and homework free time to just hang out as a family. This summer is not the same. There is a heaviness. Life is a bit dull and mundane, the weekdays run into the weekends with life revolving around Curt’s needs and limitations. We can’t talk about the future because we don’t have one, the present is pretty uneventful and the past is too painful at this point to relive. So here we are in the right now. Unable to travel, plan or even carry on a conversation. What’s the point of our lives right now? I ask myself that almost everyday. We are thankful that he is still here, even in this capacity. Curt loves the sun and we are happy that he can enjoy the hot summer days and the stronger rays that warm his body, tan his skin, and make his smile all the much brighter.

Cindy, Curt, Clarissa, Cayden & Corbin

Clarissa, Alan, Corey, Kevin, Mom, Cayden, Dad & Corbin enjoyed another great weekend
at my parents Lake Nacimiento house!
Thanks Dad & Mom for being responsible for all the kids and giving them an outlet for fun!

Clarissa broke her hand while off-roading at the Lake.
Her first broken bone!

Happy Father's Day to the best Dad ever!

Before He Was Tan

Dear Friends & Family,

The other day Corbin told me that he doesn't remember Daddy before he was tan (sick). I asked him if he remembered Daddy teaching him to ride his motorcycle, wakeboard or tucking him in bed at night. He said he doesn't remember anything; the way he walked, talked or rode a bike. I have to agree that there are many things I don't remember also; his voice, his mannerisms and his energy.

Corbin and I continued to talk about how our lives have changed. No more weekend trips, not as many play dates, not being able to plan trips this summer and how we have to spend most of our days at home now. Corbin then turned the conversation around and said that we are all getting good rest, we have many friends that come to see us, we have a nice home and pool to enjoy and we can relax more. Corbin never ceases to amaze me. We are thankful for his positive attitude and his ability to show everyone the bright side.

Luckily we have tons of photos and some video of Curt. Since I have no new pictures for tonight's post, it is the perfect night to take a stroll down memory lane with photos!

Meanwhile, please pray for each of us. Things have never been more difficult (I think I keep saying that), but really, it is tough to see Curt battle this horrible disease. We can barely understand Curt's words and it breaks our hearts. We are all having difficulties dealing with what is happening to Curt and have been leaning on each other a lot. We are sad, lonely, defeated and exhausted from this journey.  Thank you for your prayers.

Cindy, Curt, Clarissa, Cayden & Corbin

24 Years

Dear Family & Friends,

In 24 years, the price of postage has doubled, the price of gas has tripled and my love for Curt has increased beyond measure.

Twenty-four years ago, we were young (22), in love and ready to begin our future as Mr. & Mrs. Ziemke. We looked forward to growing old together.


June 4, 1988

The kids enjoyed a mid-week backyard bar-b-que!
and jacuzzi time!
Corbin used to enjoy Harley rides with Curt. Now he enjoys riding with Papa!

June 4, 2012
24 years!