Dear Friends & Family,
As Dorothy said in the Wizard of Oz, "If I ever go looking for my heart's desire, I won't look any farther than my own back yard." I too have discovered to look no farther.
For months I have been struggling to carry this burden alone. I had it in my mind that I must protect Curt from my feelings of sadness and anxiety. I figured he must feel bad enough about leaving us and the pain we are going through, why should I burden him with more. Aside from venting to friends here and there (and venting on this blog), most of my feelings were kept to myself. Meanwhile, I was about to have a breakdown. Last Tuesday, I was as low as I have ever been; I spent almost the entire day at work (in an empty office) crying uncontrollably. By the time I got home I was sick. Curt persuaded me to open up to him and months of emotions came pouring out. In the end he told me that it helps him to know how I am feeling. He said it makes him feel more connected. Last week, I wrote on this blog that we are on different wavelengths; that he is preparing to die and I am preparing to live without him. This week we are communicating like we used to; nothing is off limits. I feel a heavy load has been lifted from my shoulders and we are connecting emotionally and physically better than we have in months. Thank you for praying for us, your prayers are definitely being answered.
On the note of "answered prayers", Clarissa is loving Cal State Long Beach. She has reconnected with some old friends and met new ones at CSULB. She just finished "Rush Week" and was selected/accepted by her top choice Sorority and is now a Delta Zeta. Between work, classes, studying and her social schedule she is one busy girl. Although she is on the run a lot, she always makes time for Curt and they still have lots of laughs together!
Thank you all for reading, encouraging us and praying. This is one tough ride, thanks for sharing it with us!
Cindy, Curt, Clarissa, Cayden & Corbin
|Friday: Dinner at the Fish Company with Jim & Colleen|
then back to our house for dessert with Larry!
|Saturday: Mark & Kelli took us on a tour of their hometown - Downey, we saw the homes they grew up in. It was fun to hear their childhood memories as we drove around. |
We had dinner at Mark's favorite mexican restaurant, Casa Gamino.
|Corbin loves hanging out with Mark & Kelli....and Dad.|
|Clarissa & Chelsea at her first Sorority Dance.|
|Clarissa & Friends at the Rascall Flatts Concert|
|Happy Birthday Barbara!|
|Cayden was having fun taking photos with Clarissa's Mac|